The following is a over view of lived experience from 7year chunks seems that every seven years from d.o.b 08/07/1979 some shift happens as you know.
Myers brigs personality type infj-infp
Enagram type 9
Up to 7 years old floating above bed o,b,e
followed by visit to doctors with unexplained un physical measurable heat in abdomen. (Kundalini?) first noted spirit communicating while out playing alone on bike seeing auras round plants.
14years old feeling very different not getting other people my age, achieved good results as a competing swimmer. Best subjects were advanced sciences, technical drawing, geography and physical education. parents divorce drop out of school became junior youth leader at youth club become role model to peers. Apprentice mechanical fitter.
21years 9/11 World Trade centre caused beginning of turning inwards lots of life changing events becoming very deep in thought not knowing what was missing depersonalisation severe stress poor relationships. witnessing a fatal traffic accident diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic medicated and stigmatised isolated reclusive.mind to mind communication with stranger said have faith (started a spiritual practice prayer tai chi crystal healing metaphysical study.) qualified as a part time sessional youth worker.
28years completed 7years dedicated tai chi strong energy worker and raising and purifying energy body under supervision of master of Chinese medicine and her mentor a prof of complementary medicine.
Awakening was during withdrawal from neuroleptic medication abrupt probable flood of dopamine.
causing some of parinolia( visual auditory), shamanic rituals, possession states spontaneously yoga and poetry,
the extra strength that marital artist train for i.e.,chi moving the body (moving with the spirit) sudden flexibility, acrobatic forms and enhanced spatial ability, guiding and affecting projectiles in mid flight. Un able to stop moving body with chi taken over, becoming frightening. could not dress or fold clothes as sensation was that my body was extending chi in to all objects that I touched and they became magnetically tracked by mind and universe.(water flowing through a hose pipe causing movement)
Un mesurable( I think the word is pyhcosomatic heat) heat in abdomen like when I was seven years old. Auras visible around social worker. seeing shimmering beings and blue beings infrequently (I Had a deep coviction that I have waited many lifetimes for this opertunity to undo the karmic knots which I was very sad about an had no idea how) speaking in an un recognisable voice deep and rich.
35 years visited hospital twice after several years of attempted withdrawal, attended and trained in mediumship at churches for 5 years as was being visited by energys who touched me on head shoulders energy very tangible like orgasmic, also I was being prodded if spirit is not of high vibration I can tell the two as beings of light or shadow beings.
noted on paper what voices were saying for several years, discovered and practiced spirit release by counselling spirit voices who visited. Dialogues with beings who found pleasure in prompting me to take my life. Practiced a cleaning technique from karmic and thought forms self taught, and how beings would enjoy my thoughts based in guilt and shame.
Worked on primordial wound and inner child,soul retreaveal self taught . Used a method for clearing my ancestors and my previous life doings what ever they may be. Un covered sexual abuse when I was 5years old that I compartmentalised stoped unwanted sexual dreams by becoming lucid and decreeing and fighting back at my abuser with source as a child of god.
Arrived at a place of neutrality no trauma bothering me. And a sympathetic psychiatrist and team allowing what he terms a modern approach . previously un heard of as supported withdrawal using a protocol I have learned from trial after trial of personal research and apeasing and finding the way that has least harm.
Using dream time to interpret life decisions and lucid transmutation, heroes journey type dream worlds adventures.
Trained as a peer mentor for the charity mind
became a recovery mentor 2.5 years
completed a level 2 in supporting people in recovery
peer facilitator for support groups 5 years
unofficial volunteer at light house drop in centre 6years yarm road Stockton on tees, completed a course with Emma Intergrative mental health university supporting people in spiritual emergence
Spiritual crisis network conference attendance met Katie Motram
--------------------------------------
I have lived experience of Apathy, indifference,depression, panic, dark night of soul, spiritual suffocation, spiritual block. abuse from hospital ward ,chemical cosh, strapped to bed, physical restraint, patient violence compulsory treatments side effects near fatal illness and recovery andStigma isolation, moral dilemmas, and invalidation. States of rage and anger protest and venomous out burst when persistently invalidated.
Peak experiences. I have also exsperenced wu-wei a unity type consciousness a fertile void emptiness. Ego death?
Unconfirmed enlightenment type fullness and wellbeing. inspired speech deep emotional connection profound insite and sense of humour joy and deep world connection and connection to cosmos.
*Normalised and currently feeling very ordinary last hospital admit was 2012 and very functional taking just one medication 120mg clopixol injection once fortnight an unusually low dose less that therapeutic level but still I am proceeding with very safe protocol of 6 month tappers over the last five years so far.
The following five years are not documented but would be described as in my posts in the forum
Darren
Thank you Darren for sharing your journey. I find it very inspiring.